THE DIFFERENCE A SPACE CAN MAKE…

Sometimes a little difference is, in reality, a very big 180-degree kind of difference, a night-and-day type of difference. The details matter.

Have you ever tried to freeze water at 33 degrees? What about calling someone but being one number off in their phone number, or worse yet, being off by only one number in the bajillion dollar lottery? What if a doctor performed a skilled procedure and forgot to wash her hands or failed to put on gloves beforehand? Sometimes little things are a BIG DEAL.

Which leads me to this difference…

Extra ordinary

&

Extraordinary

One little space, that’s the difference. But what a huge difference that little space makes in those words! The word ‘extra’ conjures up words like especially, very, and more while the word ‘ordinary’ is synonymous with words like usual, regular, common, average and normal. Extra ordinary, therefore, means “especially average” or “very usual” or “more average” and such. Extraordinary, on the other hand, is explained with words like uncommon, amazing, astonishing, special, remarkable, wonderful and great. Two very different meanings for sure.

So what does this little observation have to do with anything, really? For me, it signifies two important life skills that are keys to turning extra ordinary into extraordinary. These life skills are persistence and paying attention to the details in how someone communicates with you.

PERSISTENCE. Sometimes attaining a goal or successfully doing something is just a small space away…but we quit. We stay at extra ordinary and miss out on extraordinary. Persistence, sticking with it, is a very important life skill for people of all ages, even babies. Babies who don’t give up when they fail at learning new tasks and instead try again and again and again and again learn new skills much faster than babies who fail and quickly stop attempting. Of course, the same is true for children and adults. Extraordinary people of all ages often find difficult tasks (academic, athletic, body, mind, spiritual, creative,…the list is endless) to be challenging but don’t quit. They don’t let “not knowing” become an excuse for giving up. They may not be enjoying the difficult task. In fact, they probably aren’t, but they do it anyway. They keep trying. Persistent people practice when they would rather be doing something else. They work hard.

PAYING ATTENTION. What about the details? Paying attention to details allows extraordinary people to capitalize on what is going on in any given moment. Being aware of oneself, one’s environment, and others gives a person an advantage, insight, when relating with others. Some people are naturally skilled at noticing and respond accordingly. Important social details are embedded in a person’s nonverbals. His facial expression, her body posture, little nuances that send additional messages a person is not conveying in his overt words or actions. The WAY we say or do something is the details. Extraordinary people notice the WAY people say or do things as much as what they person is saying or doing. In fact, extraordinary people realize that nonverbals trump words when it comes to communicating.

If you are a counselor or teacher looking for lessons on these two 21^st century skills to use with a whole class or an individual student, here are two stand-alone lessons on how persistence and attention to nonverbal communication can help turn extra ordinary into extraordinary!